Don't Quit!
I've had one of those interesting weeks where everything seems to synchronize perfectly. It started with a moment of déjà vu at the beginning of the week and culminated just barely when I realized that yesterday marked my third year of working my current job. Let's start with the déjà vu moment.
I was making my regular drive from school to work. It's the same drive I've made at least 4 days out of week, 8 months out of the year for the last two years. I've long ago memorized the length of time that drive requires, and nothing about the route had changed, but as I was driving in the beautiful February sunshine I suddenly remembered a gorgeous May day two years ago when I first made the journey. That was a very different day. I'd just attended my first religious institute class and was making my way to a friendly park to eat my lunch. That day two years ago had marked the beginning of summer vacation, historically a time in my life when I work extra, but that May I was done with work. For the last year and a half I had worked 5 days a week from 10:30 until the cows went home, had perhaps taken 4 days off for sickness, and a couple days off for family days or holidays, and I'd never taken a lunch break. Additionally, I'd just finished helping my boss move the company warehouse and had been working until 10 p.m. or later many nights. At work I felt like a lot of time was wasted, and was daily frustrated with my boss and his love of talking. I was simply done. I'd come home from work and cry myself to sleep knowing I had to get up and go to work the next day. There were many days when I was absolutely ready to quit, but I also knew the company could not survive this stressful time without me, so instead I cut back my hours that summer. As an excuse to reduce my workload, I enrolled in an institute class at a time that would prevent me from getting to work before 1-o-clock in the afternoon. Somehow I thought that cutting the hours back would fix the problem. In a way it did, but in the real way, it didn't.
I discovered much later that 18-year-old me had been operating off a false belief that when you have a job you love, problems never arise. I thought that amazing jobs were always amazing with never a bad moment. Based on that idea, quitting was certainly the only way to solve my work stress. I will remain forever grateful that I didn't quit. I've since discovered that all good things require effort, stress, and often tears. I've seen this in relationships, school papers, speeches, and most definitely my job. You see, even amazing jobs have hard days, rough weeks, and tiring months. I absolutely love what I do, but that love doesn't prevent dull projects, tight deadlines, frustrated customers, or mistakes from happening. Loving your job doesn't even mean you love every moment of your work. Truth be told, I'm not sure what it means to love your job. What I do know is that one of the most valuable choices I ever made was to stick with it through the hardest moments. Yes, I changed my schedule, got mad, and told my boss that what he was asking me to do was a hassle and that he talked too much. Yep, I went home and cried myself to sleep before dragging myself in the next day. Now, two years later, I've discovered that even the toughest moments end. Frustrated customers, if treated right, will calm down. I've learned that the best feeling comes when you work hard, even frantically, to meet a deadline--and succeed. There is nothing like pulling off a 3-day shirt order perfectly, knowing that you were part of the team that made it happen. I've also learned that if someone is happy to pay you to sit and listen to them talk, you sit and listen.
Because I stuck it through I still have my job, and I love it even more. My boss called me on my birthday this year to wish me a cheerful day. He pretended to have a work related problem to discuss, but he clearly just called to make sure I knew he'd remembered my birthday. In the past month my boss has laughed me through a break-up and encouraged me to keep my chin up when school is hard. Right now, work is where I go when I need a break from school.
As I mentioned, however, sticking it through applies to more than just work. I've written a lot of papers in the last couple months, and I always reach a point where I'm sure my ideas stupid, my writing confusing, and that the best thing I could do is delete the entire project. Because I've learned the value of sticking through things, whenever I feel like that I shut down the computer and wait. Two days later I'll reread the paper and easily see a few edits I can make to make a good paper great.
I hear startling statistics about job retention in our culture. These days colleges are teaching students to "pivot" their career paths, helping them get ready to change jobs every 2-3 years. It's expected that people my age will have 15 different jobs throughout their life. That is absolutely appalling! And I totally understand why it happens. Jobs get tough. They always do. It's generally hard to see the end of the line when things get better. Especially if you've always been told about your "dream job" growing up, tough work situations are hard to handle. I'm here to stand up for staying strong in the hard times. I do realize that extenuating circumstances do warrant career changes, but I also want to testify that the best papers, the best art projects, the best relationships are formed when you work things out the hard way.
I was writing an artist statement for my work this week and said this: "Much of what I do as an artist is explore ideas, try, and feel like I fail, until I stumble on a solution. It is then that I remember that art, like life, is often an accident viewed with the right perspective."
So keep going. Keep trying. Keep believing. When you think you've ruined something, keep working with it. Because it really does get better, and in the end you'll look back with such gratitude for the struggles that made you who you are today.
I was making my regular drive from school to work. It's the same drive I've made at least 4 days out of week, 8 months out of the year for the last two years. I've long ago memorized the length of time that drive requires, and nothing about the route had changed, but as I was driving in the beautiful February sunshine I suddenly remembered a gorgeous May day two years ago when I first made the journey. That was a very different day. I'd just attended my first religious institute class and was making my way to a friendly park to eat my lunch. That day two years ago had marked the beginning of summer vacation, historically a time in my life when I work extra, but that May I was done with work. For the last year and a half I had worked 5 days a week from 10:30 until the cows went home, had perhaps taken 4 days off for sickness, and a couple days off for family days or holidays, and I'd never taken a lunch break. Additionally, I'd just finished helping my boss move the company warehouse and had been working until 10 p.m. or later many nights. At work I felt like a lot of time was wasted, and was daily frustrated with my boss and his love of talking. I was simply done. I'd come home from work and cry myself to sleep knowing I had to get up and go to work the next day. There were many days when I was absolutely ready to quit, but I also knew the company could not survive this stressful time without me, so instead I cut back my hours that summer. As an excuse to reduce my workload, I enrolled in an institute class at a time that would prevent me from getting to work before 1-o-clock in the afternoon. Somehow I thought that cutting the hours back would fix the problem. In a way it did, but in the real way, it didn't.
I discovered much later that 18-year-old me had been operating off a false belief that when you have a job you love, problems never arise. I thought that amazing jobs were always amazing with never a bad moment. Based on that idea, quitting was certainly the only way to solve my work stress. I will remain forever grateful that I didn't quit. I've since discovered that all good things require effort, stress, and often tears. I've seen this in relationships, school papers, speeches, and most definitely my job. You see, even amazing jobs have hard days, rough weeks, and tiring months. I absolutely love what I do, but that love doesn't prevent dull projects, tight deadlines, frustrated customers, or mistakes from happening. Loving your job doesn't even mean you love every moment of your work. Truth be told, I'm not sure what it means to love your job. What I do know is that one of the most valuable choices I ever made was to stick with it through the hardest moments. Yes, I changed my schedule, got mad, and told my boss that what he was asking me to do was a hassle and that he talked too much. Yep, I went home and cried myself to sleep before dragging myself in the next day. Now, two years later, I've discovered that even the toughest moments end. Frustrated customers, if treated right, will calm down. I've learned that the best feeling comes when you work hard, even frantically, to meet a deadline--and succeed. There is nothing like pulling off a 3-day shirt order perfectly, knowing that you were part of the team that made it happen. I've also learned that if someone is happy to pay you to sit and listen to them talk, you sit and listen.Because I stuck it through I still have my job, and I love it even more. My boss called me on my birthday this year to wish me a cheerful day. He pretended to have a work related problem to discuss, but he clearly just called to make sure I knew he'd remembered my birthday. In the past month my boss has laughed me through a break-up and encouraged me to keep my chin up when school is hard. Right now, work is where I go when I need a break from school.
As I mentioned, however, sticking it through applies to more than just work. I've written a lot of papers in the last couple months, and I always reach a point where I'm sure my ideas stupid, my writing confusing, and that the best thing I could do is delete the entire project. Because I've learned the value of sticking through things, whenever I feel like that I shut down the computer and wait. Two days later I'll reread the paper and easily see a few edits I can make to make a good paper great.
I hear startling statistics about job retention in our culture. These days colleges are teaching students to "pivot" their career paths, helping them get ready to change jobs every 2-3 years. It's expected that people my age will have 15 different jobs throughout their life. That is absolutely appalling! And I totally understand why it happens. Jobs get tough. They always do. It's generally hard to see the end of the line when things get better. Especially if you've always been told about your "dream job" growing up, tough work situations are hard to handle. I'm here to stand up for staying strong in the hard times. I do realize that extenuating circumstances do warrant career changes, but I also want to testify that the best papers, the best art projects, the best relationships are formed when you work things out the hard way.I was writing an artist statement for my work this week and said this: "Much of what I do as an artist is explore ideas, try, and feel like I fail, until I stumble on a solution. It is then that I remember that art, like life, is often an accident viewed with the right perspective."
So keep going. Keep trying. Keep believing. When you think you've ruined something, keep working with it. Because it really does get better, and in the end you'll look back with such gratitude for the struggles that made you who you are today.
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