The Joseph Smith Effect
This week was the first week of spring semester in college. As expected, it's been a week filled with worry, fear, anxiety, stress, and exhaustion. I spent the first two days of school wondering if I could handle another semester, thinking that I might have to flunk out of school because I wasn't up to the latest challenge. It was a rough two days. And contrary to what I expected, my religious institute classes were compounding the problem.
It all began on Sunday, when I realized that I didn't have enough homework on Monday morning to keep my mind occupied for the three hours before my first class. I decided to attend an extra class at institute to keep myself from overthinking my class load. I felt really good about attending that first class, and really enjoyed myself in the class. The teacher was fantastic, the energy was good, and the things I learned were fascinating. I walked out of that class and thought I might decide to attend two institute classes this semester.
And then... my school load hit me full force. I felt like I lived a week and a half in 15 hours. That's the easiest way to describe the mental exhaustion. Tuesday morning came and I was anticipating attending my "real" institute class, Dating and Courtship, because it would be a break from the stress. Alas! What I got was not what I expected. This institute class was huge, and noisy, and stressful. I'd felt so good about enrolling in that class, but it was not the peace filled experience I'd expected.
I walked away from the Dating and Courtship class feeling so confused and lost. I didn't know where to go, didn't know which religious class to take. I felt so frustrated with the Lord. If anything He should be helping me know which class I should take to learn about Him! By some random accident, my teacher from the Monday class signed me up for his class permanently. This frustrated me even more because I knew I didn't have time to take both classes, but I'd liked that class enough that I didn't want to drop the class. Life was a mess of confusion.
After 15 more long hours, Tuesday night arrived. I was decompressing by texting a good friend and we were sharing woes of the first week of school. Somewhere in the conversation he asked me when my institute class was. Since I didn't know, I just asked him when his were. He responded that he had one at 9 a.m. on Monday/Wednesday, and one at 10 a.m. on Tuesday/Thursday. The Monday/Wednesday class was the same teacher, same class topic as the class I had mistakenly signed up for, it was just at a different time. It took me mere seconds to realize that this was the answer to my prayer. I knew I liked the teacher and the topic, and if I simply moved my class to 9 a.m., I'd be able to take the class with my friend.
By Wednesday my life started fitting into place again. I finally found the peace I'd been looking for at institute, my class load didn't seem so unbearable, and I got to have a bit more of a social life than I expected.
Of course, the perfect, but still stressful way this all worked out, got me thinking. I started thinking about Joseph Smith's early childhood. You may not remember or realize, but before moving to Palmyra, New York, where he had so many amazing experiences, his family was in deep trouble. Famine, drought, financial loss, and hardship hit his family year after year until they finally moved. For those many years I'm sure they felt like nothing was working out. And yet, those trials moved and pushed them to exactly where the Lord needed them to be. How strange that sometimes it takes problems and struggles to get us in the right place at the right time!
And yet, even as I'm writing this, I realize that without the hardship and struggle of this past week, I would have nothing to say, nothing meaningful to share with any of you. We just can't see how perfect it is in the moment. But, if we pay enough attention, we might recognize the moment when everything shifts and life works out in perfect harmony.
It all began on Sunday, when I realized that I didn't have enough homework on Monday morning to keep my mind occupied for the three hours before my first class. I decided to attend an extra class at institute to keep myself from overthinking my class load. I felt really good about attending that first class, and really enjoyed myself in the class. The teacher was fantastic, the energy was good, and the things I learned were fascinating. I walked out of that class and thought I might decide to attend two institute classes this semester.
I walked away from the Dating and Courtship class feeling so confused and lost. I didn't know where to go, didn't know which religious class to take. I felt so frustrated with the Lord. If anything He should be helping me know which class I should take to learn about Him! By some random accident, my teacher from the Monday class signed me up for his class permanently. This frustrated me even more because I knew I didn't have time to take both classes, but I'd liked that class enough that I didn't want to drop the class. Life was a mess of confusion.
After 15 more long hours, Tuesday night arrived. I was decompressing by texting a good friend and we were sharing woes of the first week of school. Somewhere in the conversation he asked me when my institute class was. Since I didn't know, I just asked him when his were. He responded that he had one at 9 a.m. on Monday/Wednesday, and one at 10 a.m. on Tuesday/Thursday. The Monday/Wednesday class was the same teacher, same class topic as the class I had mistakenly signed up for, it was just at a different time. It took me mere seconds to realize that this was the answer to my prayer. I knew I liked the teacher and the topic, and if I simply moved my class to 9 a.m., I'd be able to take the class with my friend.
By Wednesday my life started fitting into place again. I finally found the peace I'd been looking for at institute, my class load didn't seem so unbearable, and I got to have a bit more of a social life than I expected.Of course, the perfect, but still stressful way this all worked out, got me thinking. I started thinking about Joseph Smith's early childhood. You may not remember or realize, but before moving to Palmyra, New York, where he had so many amazing experiences, his family was in deep trouble. Famine, drought, financial loss, and hardship hit his family year after year until they finally moved. For those many years I'm sure they felt like nothing was working out. And yet, those trials moved and pushed them to exactly where the Lord needed them to be. How strange that sometimes it takes problems and struggles to get us in the right place at the right time!
And yet, even as I'm writing this, I realize that without the hardship and struggle of this past week, I would have nothing to say, nothing meaningful to share with any of you. We just can't see how perfect it is in the moment. But, if we pay enough attention, we might recognize the moment when everything shifts and life works out in perfect harmony.
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